Wednesday, April 11, 2012

A Relationship: Full of Meaning

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A relationship between two people can have very different meanings. In some relationships such as two lovers, they can also be best friends because they share good communication. A relationship between a parent and child has a special bond because they share love, and affection for each other. However, there are times when a relationship can go bad because there is no understanding, lack of communication, and a feeling of distance in the relationship. In comparing and contrasting the two essays “Arm Wrestling with my Father” and “Shooting Dad” each have a lot in common, communicate through actions, and gain understanding for one another.


First, by comparing the two essays they have a lot in common, like each essay is about a child and their relationship with their father. However, they differ because Manning’s essay is about a relationship between father and son, and Vowell’s is about the relationship between father and daughter. In each essay the main child focused upon gives notion to a sibling in the story whether, it be a sister or a brother.


In “Arm Wrestling with My Father” the son talks about his brother joining in on the fight to beat dad, however he still never succeeded. In comparison, “Shooting Dad” the daughter mention her twin sister to compare how her sister shares more in common with her dad at first than she does. But over time both main characters come to get a better understanding for their father and how they express their love.


Second, both essay shows that these fathers communicated with their kids through action. Like “Arm Wrestling with My Father”, his father shows communication through physical play, instead of verbal communication. Also in “Shooting Dad” conversation between this Vowell and her father were incapable because they would start to argue. In paragraph 6 she speaks about her father and how they differed, “All he ever cared about were guns. All I ever cared about was art.” Her father would want her to come shoot the gun with him and her sister. But Vowell hated guns, so she stayed shut in her room feeling that her father had nothing in common to her. Throughout each essay Manning, and Vowell feel as if they do not know there father because of their lack understanding for one another. For example in Manning’s essay paragraph , He speaks about his father’s communication. “But at those times I could feel how hard he was trying to communicate, to help me, to show the love he had for me, that I could assume was there.” Manning’s father only communicated physically. In paragraph , Manning speaks on his father communication,” He never communicated as well in speech or in writing as in a strong hug, battling to make the other gasp for breath.”


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Third, after taking a close look at each essay, over time Manning and Vowell come to gain understanding with their father. In “Arm Wrestling with My Father” Manning begins to understand his father better as he gets older. His father uses a different approach to show his son he loves him. Instead of telling him how to improve his playing skills, he finally gives his son a hug. In paragraph 1, Manning expresses this hug his has with his father as being different than before, “Once our arms were wrapped around each other, however, I sensed a different message. His embrace was softer, longer than before. I remember how it surprised me and how I gave an embarrassed laugh as if to apologize to anyone watching.” Also in Vowell she finally comes to realize that she and her father are so much a like, but in a different way. In paragraph , Vowell expresses realizing how much she and her father are alike, “...And I think, Oh. My. God. My dad and I are the same person. We’re both smart-alecky loners with goofy projects and weird equipment.” So throughout the end of the essays, Manning and Vowell finally come to understand their fathers. Through out the whole essay love was shown in their relationship, it was just showed differently between the two. Vowell and her father differed from Manning and his father. While Vowell lacked of understanding between the two, Manning on the other hand just lacked of communication. These are two important factors in any relationship that can be very different in each relationship.


In conclusion to comparing and contrasting the two essays “Arm Wrestling with my Father” and “Shooting Dad” each have a lot in common, communicate through actions, and gain understanding for one another. Both essays described the love of a father to their child. Each point is clearly seen though out the paper. Vowell and Manning relationship with their fathers were unique, but at the same time similar to other people relationships with a parent. However, all relationships can go through lack of communication and understanding, it just takes a strong person to gain and keep it.


Kayla WIlliams


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